My sister and I are three and a half years apart in age. I’m 30 and she’s about to turn 27.
When we were younger we were really close.
She was bullied quite a bit due to her size and I defended her as much as possible. She was my sister and I loved her. I hated when people would make fun of her and make her cry.
But between the ages of 10 and 13, she became really hateful towards me.
She didn’t want me to defend her, so I stopped. The bullying seemed to be happening less anyway so I really didn’t think much of it after a while.
By then I was more into my friends and what I was doing. But if my parents would go out by themselves, I would be in charge of watching her and our younger brother. He was always quiet and good and never really caused any problems.
But between me and my sister, it always seemed like war had started the moment they left.
One time she got mad because I was telling her to do the chores they had left us. I went to get her out of her room and she slammed the door in my face — she didn’t quite break my nose but it sure as h*** hurt.
I left her in there, but when my parents got home she told my mother some story about how I had chased her through the house with a knife and threatened her to do her chores. My mother believed her!
She always seemed to believe her about everything.
My dad told me that he thinks it’s because they’re both the middle child and my mother was afraid that my sister would be treated like she was by my aunt when she was younger.
Over the years I became angry with my sister — she would lie and steal, and her room was always disgusting.
She hoarded food in there like she was going to starve.
She would steal my things and when confronted about it, would claim that a friend gave it to her.
Then I moved out when I was 18, and came back for a brief time when I was 21.
Nothing had changed between us, but my dad informed me at this time that he and my mother were getting divorced, and that when my mother moved my sister would be moving with her and my brother would be staying with him.
My sister was angry at our dad. I mean there was plenty of blame going around at that time, which is normal, right? I just tried my best to stay out of it.
Around this time I moved out again, but right before I moved out, my sister mentioned that was talking to a guy over the Internet.
I didn’t think much of it until her phone was laying out one day and a message popped up from him.
It was an image that he had photoshopped to put both of them in the same picture together. Only it was a picture of me with him, not her.
She had been using pictures of me to send to God knows who. I blew up on her, I was furious. My mother…took her side. Again.
By then the beautiful world of Facebook was coming out and at first, my sister and I were friends there. At least until she started posting hateful things about our dad — like “he didn’t just divorce our mother, he divorced me too. I hate him, I’m glad he’s not in my life anymore,” and so on and so forth.
I, of course, defended him and told her what I thought of her for talking about him like that.
I called our mother and she defended my sister. Both of them stopped talking to me for a while.
My point was, even if you feel that way you shouldn’t be putting it all on Facebook for the whole world to see. I blocked and deleted her.
I had just started a relationship with the man that I’m now married to, and she added him to Facebook.
I accepted the friend request to be nice because at this point he didn’t understand why we didn’t get along.
At some point, my mother and I started speaking again and she would “catch me up” with my sister and what was going on in her life; it seemed like one crazy story after another.
One where she was a security officer at a low-security jail, and one of the inmates had tried to rape her but she was able to grab a pipe that was laying on the ground and hit him in the head and kill him.
Another was where her friend was staying with her because her friend’s boyfriend had kicked her and her kids out. They were sleeping one night and she woke up to a noise and went to investigate only to find her friend’s boyfriend had broken in and was trying to assault her friend, so she shot him three times but didn’t kill him.
A couple of months later she claimed to have had a miscarriage at 16 weeks but the doctor had told her that she wouldn’t need a D&C.
Before I found out about the “not needing a D&C” I had called to check on her. Her boyfriend answered and I asked how she was and he said: “She’s fine, why?”
And I said well considering she was in the hospital the night before for a miscarriage I was just checking on her. He said, “I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about. She worked last night and she’s home in bed asleep.”
I asked my mother about it and she said that he must be confused or too upset to talk about it.
My dad told me about one time she had come to see him with her boyfriend. They had been eating and talking and raising children was brought up.
My dad stated, “If you have children be prepared to be the one to take full responsibility for the child because short of death I won’t be doing it unless it’s babysitting.”
My sister’s boyfriend asked if he had ever met his grandson and my dad was confused because the only grandson he has is through me.
My sister told him that she had had a child and had given custody to the father.
So he called and asked my mother and she stated that my sister had a godson but that was all. She had never been pregnant.
I got married a little over two years ago. I didn’t invite her to our wedding because I didn’t want her and the drama that would surely come.
She texted me and said that she wouldn’t be able to come to the wedding. I never responded.
The last thing I heard about her was that she was moving cities.
She posted about it on Facebook and stated that she was happy to be moving further away from our mother. But according to my mother, she had texted her asking my mother if she would move down there with her and her boyfriend.
I’ve chosen to just be done with her. I can’t stand her lies.
I’ve asked my mother to not tell me about her or anything going on with her anymore, and I have recently asked my husband to just delete her from Facebook.
I don’t want her to have a link to our lives, I haven’t seen her in over five years.
I’m happy with this decision because the amount of anxiety and drama she causes just isn’t worth it.
