I’ve always been a bit of a cynic, so the people around me often tell me to “be more positive.” Although my family and friends have good intentions, it wasn’t helpful for them to tell me to think in a different way without any advice about how to start changing my mindset.
It’s important not to let cynicism get to the point where it harms you, which is why having strategies for being less cynical can be helpful. Here five tips to help you become less cynical:
1. Acknowledge when your cynicism is unproductive.
I love jokes that revolve around dark humor, irony, and sarcasm. However, while satire can be an effective way to criticize foolishness or cruelty, it’s important not to let that cynicism consume you. Sometimes it’s easy to preoccupy yourself with how dark the world is, but it’s important to remember that you can work to change it.
Acknowledging when life feels heavy is important, but unless it’s accompanied by a call to action, then it’s not likely that anything will change. It’s important to remember that a lot of people feel overwhelmed, and cynicism can help you relate to people, but reminding others that we can make change is just as necessary.
2. Explore your community.
Developing a connection to the community is important for both mental health and civic participation. Joining community service or political organizations is a great way to feel like you can make a difference. If you see your actions positively affecting others — even if the impact feels small — it’s much harder to be a cynic. You can also opt to participate in groups that fit your other interests, like book clubs, sports teams, crafting circles, or singing or dancing groups. Creating a community can take your mind off the difficult parts of life. When you find a group of people who listen to and understand you, it’s harder to fall into a mental spiral.
3. Read as much as you can.
If you catch yourself believing that you’re more intelligent than your “naïve” peers because you’re more cynical than they are, try to read books by a wide variety of authors. Reading books by those who have seen the world’s horrors but still have hope for the future can help you realize that heroes aren’t just foolish people who have no concept of the world’s realities.
Philosophy is a great subject to delve into if you want to change your perspective. Many philosophers write about utopias — ideal worlds — and whether or not we can create them. While building a utopia isn’t necessarily feasible, reading about the concept might empower you to take steps to move the world closer to how you want it to be. When you know that you can make progress in this area, you often feel less cynical about the state of the world.
4. Practice self-care.
If you feel like the entire world is against you, it might be because you’re ignoring your needs. Think about how you feel and how you can help yourself feel more at ease. If you’re hungry, eat. If you’re tired, take a nap. And if you can’t identify a specific physical need, you may just need to spend some time with yourself. You could watch a movie, read a book, or indulge in a comfort food. While taking a breather might seem “unproductive,” everyone needs moments to themselves to function and find happiness. Also, it’s hard to take your own cynical, morose thoughts seriously if you’re drinking hot chocolate in a pillow fort.
5. Find the “funny.”
When you’re in a cynical mood, you might not feel like laughing. However, if you know what can make you laugh, engage in it! Laughter can release “feel-good” brain chemicals, like dopamine and serotonin, which can increase positive thoughts. Finding the funny parts of the problems you face can also help you get through them more easily. There may be a lot of evil in the world, but many of the biggest villains are so ridiculous that laughing at them can help you realize that the worst people aren’t all-powerful.
If you feel like cynicism brings you down, know that there are plenty of ways to develop a more positive mindset. Connecting with others, prioritizing yourself, and learning how you can make a difference in the world can be a powerful way to shift your perspective.
